A Reddit user turned to the community to ask if they were in the wrong for wanting to leave their boyfriend’s birthday party early after they had a disagreement.
A Birthday Party to Remember
The Original Poster (OP), a 23-year-old woman, recently organized a birthday party for her 21-year-old boyfriend. She spent three months planning the event, which was held at their shared residence and attended by their mutual friends and some of the boyfriend’s hometown acquaintances.
However, during the party, OP felt the need to leave early and is now wondering if she was in the wrong for wanting to do so.
A Drinking Game
At a party with friends, they began playing a drinking game that started off well. However, during a round where everyone shared stories, OP noticed that their mutual friend, who they will refer to as Adam, was paying close attention to the stories shared by the male participants but repeatedly cut off and belittled the stories told by the female participants.
Although Adam was known to have a confrontational attitude when drunk, OP initially let it slide twice, but on the third occasion, she became angry.
She Flagged His Behavior With Her Boyfriend
OP messaged her boyfriend to express how she and her friends felt about Adam’s behavior and asked if he could intervene to resolve the situation so they could continue enjoying the evening.
However, her boyfriend instructed her to continue playing the game, even though Adam continued to interrupt her. Eventually, the group decided to leave and go to a club. The girls traveled in one car, while the boys traveled in another.
The Party Moved On
The group arrived at the club and queued up outside. While everyone was able to enter without any issues, OP’s boyfriend was told to queue again.
Seeing that they were alone, OP took the opportunity to speak to him about Adam. However, her boyfriend became defensive and responded by telling her that she wasn’t important to anyone in the room and that she was ruining his night and making him feel bad for having fun.
OP was taken aback by his response and decided to leave the club, telling him she would go home since she was ruining the night she had spent so much time organizing. Her boyfriend only replied with a dismissive, “ok see you later.”
He Didn’t Care
The club they went to was dangerous, and OP’s boyfriend seemed unconcerned about leaving her stranded and in danger as he went back into the club to look for his friends.
When OP messaged the girls to let them know she was going home, they urged her not to let her boyfriend ruin the night that she had worked so hard to plan.
After having a small mental breakdown in the club’s toilets, OP emerged to find a group of mutual friends who came to dance with her. She made sure to keep her distance from her boyfriend, who mostly ignored her and gave her dirty looks whenever they crossed paths.
She Felt Unappreciated
OP felt hurt and underappreciated by her boyfriend’s behavior and wondered if she was in the wrong for feeling this way or if she should have kept her feelings to herself and pretended to enjoy the night.
She later added that she is autistic, and confrontations make her anxious, which is why she didn’t confront Adam about his behavior.
The majority of Reddit users who commented on the post agree that OP is not the jerk. Many believe that the boyfriend’s behavior was unacceptable, and he should have addressed Adam’s misogynistic behavior.
What Redditors Said
Several users also suggested that OP should dump her boyfriend, as he made it clear that he did not value her or her feelings. Some users added that the boyfriend’s behavior was a sign of his immaturity and selfishness and that OP deserved someone who respects and appreciates her.
While others expressed concern about OP’s safety and noted that the club they went to was not safe, and the boyfriend was willing to leave her stranded and in danger.
Some users also mentioned that Adam’s behavior was rude and disrespectful towards women, and the boyfriend’s lack of action made him complicit in Adam’s behavior.
What do you think? What would you do if you were OP?
The post He Accused Her of Ruining His 21st Birthday Party. But She Couldn’t Take Any More of His Mysogynistic Friend’s Comments first appeared on Wealthy Living
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / Dean Drobot. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.
Source: Reddit