Recently, a woman asked the Reddit community whether she was wrong for stepping down as bridesmaid because her sister asked too much of her. Here’s the full story.
She Was Excited to Be a Bridesmaid
When the Original Poster’s (OP) sister asked her to be a bridesmaid for her wedding, she was super thrilled.
OP, aged 43, had missed her sister’s first wedding as she was deployed in Afghanistan, and she was eager to be a part of her sister’s special day.
However, things quickly took a turn when she realized just how much her sister was asking of her and her guests.
The Costs Were Adding Up
First, there was the cost of the bridesmaid dress and shoes, which set OP back over $500.
Then there was the bachelorette party, which her sister was planning in Las Vegas, requiring flights, hotels, and more expenses.
On top of that, there was an engagement party and a bridal shower, each requiring gifts, and the cheapest option on their registry was $165.
Just when OP thought it couldn’t get any worse, her sister dropped the news that they had decided to have a resort wedding in the Caribbean.
A Destination Wedding
This meant yet another trip, flight, and hotel stay for everyone involved.
OP says that as someone who has never been married, she was unaware of how much weddings cost, but even she could see that this was too much.
To make matters worse, OP’s sister’s fiancé was also having a second wedding, which meant that many families and friends were being asked to give three different gifts and attend multiple events before the wedding.
This was a far cry from OP’s sister’s first wedding, which was held locally, with guests only being asked to give one gift and attend one party.
She Didn’t Know When She Agreed
When OP agreed to be a bridesmaid, her sister and fiancé were still considering venues in their local area, and they didn’t mention any bachelorette party or having their wedding in another country.
OP also thought that the bridesmaid dress and shoes would be provided for her, as was the case with her sister’s first wedding.
However, as the costs continued to pile up, OP realized that she was expected to pay for everything on her own, including the dress and shoes.
She Tried to Tell Her
OP tried to explain to her sister that this was getting too much for her and the other bridesmaids and the guests, but she did not take OP’s views well.
They had a couple of big arguments, and OP felt increasingly frustrated with her sister.
She wanted to stand with her at her wedding, but it was starting to feel like an impossible task.
What made things even worse was that OP’s sister didn’t seem to care about anyone’s feelings or concerns. She was so focused on having the perfect wedding that she wasn’t listening to anyone’s objections.
She Had One Thing on Her Mind
It was causing tension and arguments, and OP worried that it would end up ruining the day.
Her sister had said that she didn’t get it because she’s never been married.
Now OP feels bad for what happened, and she asked Reddit for their views.
Readers Thought It Was Absurd
Redditors sided with OP and said what her sister is doing is absurd, and there’s nothing wrong with saying the requirements are too expensive and bowing out.
One Redditor wrote, “Explain you didn’t know the cost when you agreed and can no longer afford it. I’m sure she’ll whine since she doesn’t seem to be mature about the situation but it’s not worth ending up broke. Pretty sure others on the wedding list will follow your lead too. They’re just waiting for someone else to do it first.”
Another Reddit user pointed out that OP’s sister is asking a lot of her wedding party and guests, and it’s understandable that OP is feeling overwhelmed and frustrated with the increasing costs and demands.
What do you think? Did OP do the right thing by telling her sister and stepping down?
The post She Can’t Afford to Be a Bridesmaid in Her Sister’s Wedding, but She’s Not Taking No for an Answer first appeared on Wealthy Living
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / Dean Drobot. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.