Racist Daughter Shall Still Go to the Ball but Her Wronged Brother Stays at Home! Are We Teaching Our Kids That Racism Is OK?

A Reddit user turned to the community to ask if they were in the wrong for punishing their son after he took revenge on his sister for some hurtful comments she made about his friend.

A Big Family

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OP, a 48-year-old female, and her husband, a 51-year-old male, have a family of six children consisting of a 19-year-old male, 16-year-old female, 14-year-old female, 13-year-old male, 11-year-old male, and 5-year-old female.

Their 16-year-old daughter, Gianna, is a junior in high school while their 13-year-old son, Ryker, is currently in 7th grade.

School Dances

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OP’s children are preparing for their upcoming school dances, with the 7th-grade dance scheduled for later this month and the junior banquet set to take place in early May.

Choosing Dresses

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OP and her husband have taken the time to go shopping for dress clothes for all their children to wear to these events.

They had already purchased a dress for their 16-year-old daughter, Gianna, a few weeks prior.

A Change in Behavior

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Throughout her life, Gianna, the 16-year-old daughter of OP, has generally been a well-behaved child.

However, this school year has been somewhat more challenging for her.

Racist Jokes

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Approximately two months ago, OP and her husband received a call from Gianna’s choir teacher, who informed them that Gianna and a few other had been making racist jokes about some of the new pieces that the teacher had introduced, including an Urdu song and a song from Honduras.

Unacceptable

mental issue
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After receiving the concerning call from Gianna’s choir teacher about her daughter’s inappropriate behavior, OP and her husband had a talk with Gianna.

They discussed her actions and clarified that her behavior was unacceptable.

A Formal Apology

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As a consequence, Gianna has to write a formal apology to her teacher for her behavior.

An Essay About Culture

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Additionally, OP and her husband assigned Gianna a writing task, which entailed composing a 5-paragraph essay that explains the significance of respecting music from other cultures.

Frustration

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One of Ryker’s friends from his baseball team has a Honduran background, although he was born in the United States.

Upon learning of his friend’s cultural heritage, Ryker expressed his frustration with the insensitive jokes Gianna, and her friends made about the Honduran song in front of his friend’s mixed-race parentage.

Cultural Appreciation

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Ryker asked his parents if his friend could come over and teach them about the culture, to which they agreed.

During the visit, the family prepared traditional food, and Ryker and his friend discussed sports and music in Honduras.

Although Gianna seemed uninterested, her parents encouraged her to participate.

Another Incident

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Unfortunately, OP’s daughter and a group of her friends, including her boyfriend, were involved in another incident where they made racist jokes.

Checking Her Phone

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In response, OP and her husband took their daughter’s phone to investigate where the hateful behavior might be coming from.

A Thought Provoking Discussion

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On the night that OP’s son, Ryker, found out about the racist jokes made by his sister and her friends, he had some of his friends over for a sleepover.

During dinner, the boys discussed their coach’s strict policies against bullying and racist behavior.

Good Parenting

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OP and her husband tried to help guide them through their emotions, asking them about the diverse athletes they admired.

At the Mall

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Meanwhile, Gianna was at the mall with her friends, some of whom were shopping for dresses for the upcoming dance.

Revenge

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While the girls were out, Ryker and his friends decided to vandalize one of the dresses that Gianna’s friends had purchased.

They used mud, drinks, and scissors to damage the dress.

Gianna was shocked and upset when she came home and discovered the ruined dress in her room.

Discovered


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After discovering that her son Ryker and his friends had vandalized the dress, OP confronted them about their behavior.

The boys were laughing and insinuating that they didn’t deserve to attend the dance.

Actions Have Consequences


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OP and her husband tried to explain to Ryker that they were doing their best to educate their children in a predominantly white community and that his behavior was not acceptable.

They told him that he would be unable to attend his 7th-grade dance as a consequence of his actions.

However, Ryker was defiant and responded rudely, retreating to his room with his friends.

Called Out for Unfair Discipline

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After OP and her husband disciplined Ryker for inappropriate behavior, he texted his grandparents and other family members to seek support and defense.

Some of them contacted OP and her husband, expressing concern for Ryker’s well-being and suggesting that he was simply struggling to cope with his emotions. This response has left OP and her husband unsure about their actions and whether they were wrong. 

Who Was Wrong?

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Many Reddit users believe that the OP is the issue in this situation. They argue that the punishment for destroying a dress is more severe than the punishment for racism, which the daughter displayed multiple times.

They question why Gianna is still allowed to attend the dance despite her behavior and why Ryker is being punished without receiving any education. Some users suggest that the education given to Gianna was performative and that the parents are showing favoritism towards her.

Daughter Should Have Been Punished Properly

Many agree that the daughter should have been punished properly for the first offense, and if the parents had parented properly, the second incident wouldn’t have happened.

Some users feel that Ryker’s actions were in reaction to his sister’s continued racist comments and suggest that she should have been the one staying home.

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The post Racist Daughter Shall Still Go to the Ball but Her Wronged Brother Stays at Home! Are We Teaching Our Kids That Racism Is OK? first appeared on Wealthy Living.

Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / fizkes. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.

Source: Reddit