He rewarded his son and daughter differently. His son got a brand-new truck when he finished trade school, and his daughter got a second-hand car when she finished graduate school.
Two Different Rewards
The Original Poster (OP), a 56-year-old father of two, has one son aged 28 and a daughter aged 22. He wonders whether he was wrong in how he rewarded his children.
OP, who claims to love his children equally, acknowledges that they are different individuals with different needs and priorities. He has helped both his children based on their respective needs, despite the fact that they are not the same.
After graduating, OP’s son, who did not do well in high school, decided to attend a community college.
He realized after just one semester that college was not for him, so he went to trade school and eventually settled on a career in HVAC.
He Rewarded His Son With a Truck
Although he had a hard time sticking to things, the father rewarded his son’s certification in HVAC by buying him a brand-new truck as a gift.
Meanwhile, OP’s daughter had been more academically inclined since high school, so when she got accepted into a good college out of state, it came as no surprise to the father.
When she was about to finish high school, she assumed her father would also buy her a new car, even though he had never promised her one.
She Thought She Would Get a New Car, Like Her Brother
When the father explained to her that a college student in a big city would have no use for a car, she asked if he could help with her tuition.
OP declined, as he had not paid for his son’s trade school. When his daughter seemed down, OP offered to buy a used car in his name, which she could use until he decided to sell it. She would have to maintain it, though.
His daughter was happy with this arrangement, so OP purchased a 99 BMW for a low price.
She Got a Second-Hand Car
Although the body was in good condition, the car needed work on the engine and transmission and required a new coat of paint.
His daughter initially fixed the car’s essentials but gradually started doing unnecessary repairs, even though her father had not requested them. She also repainted most of the car and had the interior detailed.
When she returned home after finishing her finals, her father decided it was time to sell the car and listed it. The daughter seemed upset, even though they had previously agreed to sell it, and the father had never asked her to repaint the car.
OP Was Selling the Car
She thought he would sell it much later when it rusted and believed he could sell it for a higher price because of her improvements.
OP explained that the price of used cars had risen significantly since he bought the BMW before the pandemic, and that’s why he could sell it for more. He also offered to pay her back half of the paintwork.
Now, OP is questioning whether he is in the wrong situation. He believed he had made it clear he was going to sell the car and never asked his daughter to spend extra money on it. However, he also feels bad that he upset her and that she had spent so much time and money fixing up the car.
Ace80908 said, “And “helping based on their needs” is you knowing you favor your son and treating your daughter like trash.”
Another wrote, “You bought your son a brand new truck, and you’re not even willing to allow your daughter to keep a used car that you got “really cheap”? Yeah, you’re wrong, and you don’t “help your kids based on their needs”, you favor one of them massively.”
What do you think? Was he keeping up with their agreement, or is this an example of unequal treatment among his children? What would you do?
The post He Bought His Son a New Truck and His Daughter an Old Car, Is He Showing Favoritism? first appeared on Wealthy Living
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / Koldunov. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.