A frustrated girlfriend wrote about a recent experience with her boyfriend on a Reddit subthread, asking if she was in the wrong for entering a concert without him after he was late.
It Had Been a Long Time Coming
The Original Poster (OP), a 27-year-old female, had been eagerly anticipating the opportunity to see a music group perform live prior to the onset of the COVID-19 pandemic. Upon learning that the group would be coming to her city, she made the decision to purchase a ticket for the event.
OP sent a link to the Band’s Spotify page with her boyfriend, a 29-year-old male, indicating that she was attending the event and asking if he would be interested in joining her.
The message clearly stated that she was content to attend alone, as he knew she often attended concerts solo.
He Wanted to Go With Her
Her boyfriend responded promptly, expressing interest in joining her, although OP was aware that he had not yet had the chance to listen to the band’s music. She assumed he was attending for the overall atmosphere of the event.
OP purchased two tickets for €25 each and did not ask her boyfriend to contribute to the cost.
On the day of the concert, OP and her boyfriend arranged to meet for a drink at 7 pm, before the 8 pm start time. Given the small size of the venue and the absence of any support acts, OP was confident that the band would begin performing promptly.
He Was Late
However, by 7 pm, OP had not received a response from her boyfriend regarding their meeting place, and despite her attempts to contact him, he was unresponsive.
At 7:40 pm, he messaged her, explaining that he had fallen asleep and would be taking a taxi to the venue. Unfortunately, due to the high volume of redirected traffic in the city center that night, her boyfriend was still two miles away from the venue at 7:55 pm.
At 7:55 pm, OP sent her boyfriend his concert ticket and informed him that she would meet him inside the venue. While she was aware that this upset him, she had been waiting to see the band perform for more than four years and did not want to miss a single moment of the concert.
She Wasn’t Going to Wait
Upon arriving at the venue, OP located a suitable spot to view the concert. She then attempted to send a message to her boyfriend about her location but found no signal available.
Given the crowd’s size, OP could not actively search for her boyfriend, so she waited for him to find her. He eventually did so during the concert’s final song and was clearly displeased.
He Said She Made No Effort
When asked what was wrong, her boyfriend accused her of not making any attempt to locate him inside the venue. OP admitted to not having done so, which further angered her boyfriend.
He expressed frustration with her, stating that he had only attended the concert for her sake, that she had not made an effort to introduce him to the band’s music beforehand, and that she had ruined his evening.
OP attempted to explain to her boyfriend that she believed the situation was simply an unfortunate turn of events. However, he persisted in stating that he had attended the concert solely for her and that she had ruined his evening by not waiting for him, despite the fact that he had gone out of his way to accompany her.
He Didn’t Have to Come
OP felt increasingly exasperated with her boyfriend’s accusations and went back to their previous messages to prove that she had not pressured him into attending the concert.
She read aloud their conversation, which clearly indicated that he was under no obligation to come and had simply been given a link to the band’s Spotify page and the date and time of the concert.
However, her boyfriend refused to acknowledge her explanation and accused her of simply wanting to win the argument.
OP was left feeling frustrated and believed that she had done everything in her power to rectify the situation, short of missing the concert entirely. She did not feel that it was fair for her boyfriend to expect her to do so.
Additionally, if the roles had been reversed and she had been in danger of making her boyfriend late for a concert that he had been waiting to see for years, she would have encouraged him to go and enjoy the show without her.
Was She Being Unreasonable?
Ultimately, OP wondered if she was in the wrong and had acted unfairly in this scenario.
Reddit users overwhelmingly agree that OP is not wrong in this scenario. They believe that OP’s boyfriend is trying to deflect blame for his own mistakes and is gaslighting OP by making her feel responsible for his lateness.
They feel that he should have taken the initiative to listen to the band’s music beforehand, set the alarm to avoid oversleeping, and met up with OP on time.
They believe that OP did everything in her power to include her boyfriend and that he has no right to accuse her of ruining his evening when he was the one who showed up late.
They Caution Her to Pay Attention to His Behavior
Some users advise OP to monitor her boyfriend’s behavior and reflect on whether this behavior is a regular occurrence. They also suggest that OP try to communicate with her boyfriend more effectively by calling out his deflections and focusing on his own accountability.
In summary, Reddit users believe that OP’s boyfriend is well within her rights in this situation and should freely enjoy the concert without feeling guilty.
What do you think? What would you have done as OP?
The post She’d Been Waiting Years to Attend This Concert, so When He Was Late, She Went in Without Him! first appeared on Wealthy Living
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Source: Reddit