Family dynamics can be complex, particularly when cultural traditions and differing opinions come into play. In a Reddit post, a person recently found herself in a delicate situation involving her cousin and her husband.
Her Cousin Married Abroad
The Original Poster (OP) is a 26-year-old, and her cousin, Kate, is aged 29. OP doesn’t live in America
Her cousin, Kate, got married five years ago after moving to the US to attend university.
Since the wedding was held in America, most of their family was unable to attend.
The majority of their family have low incomes, so they couldn’t afford to pay for travel and lodging. Kate’s husband only agreed to host Kate’s parents at his residence.
They Moved to Her Home Country
Since the cost of living in OP’s country is somewhat affordable, Kate and her husband moved to her home country after the COVID-19 pandemic. Their business had suffered, and they couldn’t make ends meet.
Around that time, she gave birth to a child, and her husband flatly refused to have a welcoming ceremony for the child, which is basically a baby shower where relatives slaughter two pigs and give the new family member gifts that are mostly random things like baby clothes, cribs, and livestock.
He claimed that the ceremony was and still is barbaric, but no one objected because it was their child.
He Didn’t Appreciate Their Local Traditions
OP’s brother-in-law rarely interacts with people, spends his time indoors, and only goes to work. He doesn’t want them to taint his child with any “primitive nonsense,” therefore OP and her family don’t visit them very much.
But they maintain the peace with him for Kate’s benefit, even though she consistently sides with her spouse.
Recently, OP had her baby two months ago, and they celebrated her arrival last week. OP received a lot of gifts because this was her first child, and OP’s husband’s family was being very generous with the gifts.
Her Cousin Was Jealous
Even though OP’s cousin’s sister and her family were invited, she showed up, kept to herself the entire time, and left early.
A few days later, the cousin came to visit OP, who was still at her mother’s house recovering from childbirth, and unexpectedly, she lost it at all of them for alienating her and showing favoritism against her and her baby.
She went on to say that they didn’t care about her anymore.
As a result, OP informed her that she was to blame for the situation and that she should only blame her husband.
It Was Her Husband’s Fault
She claimed to OP that OP has no legitimate reason to despise her husband and that OP is merely jealous because she wed a man her own age. OP mentioned her husband is ten years older than her.
OP shouted at her that she was crazy, and then she left.
OP’s mother and aunt told her that OP shouldn’t have said that as the cousin is going through a difficult time and needs someone
As a result, OP now feels bad about what happened.
She took to Reddit to ask if she was in the wrong, and several Redditors sided with OP.
One Reddit user said OP was not wrong and wrote, “She and her husband have alienated themselves, also like tons of cultures have pig slaughter ceremonies for various things, it’s hardly a rarity.”
Another Redditor commented, “You reap what you sow. She chose to follow her husband’s edicts and to turn her back on all of that history and tradition. Which is her right. But it’s also your right to follow your traditions, and it’s not your fault that she didn’t. She’s been isolated from your family by her husband. And she seems ok with it. She can’t have it both ways. You hardly see her and your niece. Why would you just randomly give her things? It doesn’t sound like you even have much of a relationship, if any.”
So what is your opinion? Do you think OP was in the wrong here?
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The post Her Cousin’s Husband Says Their Culture Contains “Primitive Nonsense” and Doesn’t Want Any Part of It, Leading To Them Being Isolated From the Community first appeared on Wealthy Living
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Source: Reddit