A woman sought advice from Reddit, but she didn’t get the support she was looking for.
A Strong Relationship
The relationship between a 26-year-old woman and her 28-year-old fiancé started three years ago and has been strong ever since.
They got engaged three months ago and have been planning their November wedding. During a recent discussion about their financial plans for the future, an argument erupted when the woman asked about being added to the house deed.
He Had an Inheritance
Her fiancé inherited a large sum of money from his uncle when he was 23, which has set him up for life. Despite this, he is not one for flashy things and spends most of his money on his hobbies.
This inheritance caused him to be wary of people using him, which made dating difficult for him during the first two years after he received the inheritance.
The woman moved in with her fiancé a year into their relationship and has never been asked to pay any bills, except for luxury items she wants.
She Didn’t Have to Work
Nine months ago, her fiancé suggested she stop working as a teacher, because he could tell that her job was not making her happy.
They agreed he would provide her with an allowance each month, and he expected her to find hobbies and passions because they both agreed they did not want children. She was happy with the arrangement, and it improved her mental health.
During their financial planning discussion, the woman asked if she could be added to the house deed. Her fiancé became quiet and explained that he didn’t feel comfortable adding her name to the deed because he had fully paid off the house before they met.
She Wants More
He felt he was solely responsible for all the payments, and wanted to keep the house as his own. She didn’t like this, because she thought he suggested she used him.
She expected that once they got married, everything would become “theirs.” He reassured her that they would share everything, but he wanted to keep something for himself since this was the first house he had ever bought.
He also promised that if they decided to change houses or have a new one built, he would put both their names on the deed. This made her even more upset because she could not understand why he couldn’t do it for their current house.
They got into an argument, and she left to stay at her sister’s apartment. She texted a friend about the situation, who told her she was unreasonable, but she still believed her fiancé should be willing to put her name on the deed.
Is She in the Wrong?
One user wrote, “You also have zero claim on any of his inheritance, even after marriage. The only assets you will have a “right” to are assets that are co-payed for after you’re married, which is exactly what he agreed to do.”
Another added, “Why in the world would he put your name on his fully paid house? Why do you want him to? You’re paying no rent and have contributed nothing to the house. Beyond that, he’s willing to fully support you while you do…nothing.”
What do you think? Should he put her name on the house, since they’ll be getting married? Is she asking for too much or trying to protect herself if they break up?
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / Dean Drobot. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.