In this Reddit post, a grieving daughter seeks guidance after refusing to share any of her late mother’s artwork with her stepsister. Here’s the full story.
The Loss of Her Mother
The Original Poster’s (OP) parents got divorced when she was 3. Her parents continued to be close after the divorce until the day OP’s mother passed away.
When OP was 7, her father remarried Ana, and they had a daughter named Eve, now aged 22, and also a son named Jake, aged 16.
When Jake was a toddler, he was really ill, so OP’s father and stepmother spent a lot of time with him at the hospital while OP spent a lot of time at her mother’s house.
Her Mother and Stepsister Bonded
Since OP’s father worked odd hours, OP’s mom was happy to frequently invite Eve along as she loved spending time with the children.
OP’s mother was a gifted and enthusiastic artist who was keen to instill in everyone a love of the arts. She helped them both, but Eve was far more talented than OP, and OP’s mother became close with her as they both loved to paint.
After OP’s mother’s unexpected passing, OP was devastated. They were always really close and she couldn’t believe what happened.
The Loss of Her Mother Hit Her Hard
Eventually, after the grieving period, OP had the motivation to begin arranging her mother’s belongings in late April.
One day, after OP said that she was going to her mother’s house to sift through some belongings, Eve asked her if she may browse through OP’s mother’s paintings and take a few keepsakes as OP’s mother was such an inspiration to her.
But OP didn’t want to, and she declined.
OP says that the drawings and writings are the closest things OP has to her mother. She is, however, willing to give her clothes, jewelry, furniture, and virtually anything else.
She Won’t Give Up Her Mother’s Artwork
OP went on to say that it’s more than simply paintings and that there are elements of her spirit there.
She doesn’t want to let even one piece go because they are the most private things she left behind.
After expressing her views, Eve claimed she didn’t think she was asking for too much. She said she also had a close relationship with OP’s mother and that she was a significant figure in her life.
Eve thinks that if OP’s mother had the option to do so, she would have left her something.
They Think She Should Compromise
Then Eve complained to her mother after OP continued to say no, and now OP’s immediate family members are split on the subject and argue whenever they get together.
Though OP’s father is sympathetic, he believes OP can give up one or two. And while OP does believe that may have happened previously, Eve and Ana are pressing her so hard on it and acting passive-aggressively toward OP that she feels entirely different about them now.
OP says maybe she might change her opinion in a few years once the pain isn’t so raw. OP believes her sorrow is greater, and asking her for such a private thing so soon after her mother’s passing was impolite.
What aggravated OP even more, was that they failed to recognize the irony in Eve sending her own mother after OP for her deceased mother’s possessions.
OP took to Reddit to ask whether she was wrong for what she did, and thousands of comments poured in supporting OP.
They Should Have Waited
Several comments said that OP was not wrong and that her step-sister could have made the request at a later date.
One Reddit user wrote, “You lost your mother. That hurts. Perhaps a compromise would be to have a print made of one of the paintings for your step-sister. Then she gets the art she wants and you don’t have to give up the original.”
Another Redditor commented, “Your perspective is understandable, and so is hers. Hopefully, once your respective griefs over her passing are a little less raw, you’ll both be able to see the other side of this and come to an accord.”
So what is your view? What would you do if you were in this situation?
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / Dean Drobot. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.