He Can’t Choose a Gift to Save His Life, or So He Says. But He’s GF Wonders Why His Bestie Got a Top Gift While She Misses Out

A recent post on Reddit saw a man asking for help. His girlfriend had accused him of using “weaponized incompetence” when buying gifts for her, and he wanted to know if she was right. Read on to find out the whole situation.

He’s Terrible at Choosing Gifts

This guy has never been the best at gift-giving. It’s something he can’t seem to master the art of.

He’s had maybe one or two moments of spotting something and thinking, “This reminds me of them. Let me buy it.” Besides that, he’s been phoning it in with gift cards. Whenever a holiday or special event approaches, his mind goes blank to what that person would like.

But this time, the original poster (OP) had a stroke of genius leading up to his best friend’s birthday. His friend is a history buff and spends most of his time studying and traveling.

He’s also spent the last year of his life writing a dissertation that he hopes to turn into a book. OP has read over the draft versions of it as his friend works, sometimes out of curiosity, mostly to help out with proofreading as a fresh set of eyes. But it’s now very near completion.

The Perfect Gift

So OP requested another copy of his friend’s manuscript, had two copies properly bound, and wrote up an “about the author” section himself to include.

When he presented them to his friend at his birthday party, he told him the first was for him to keep as his very first copy, and the second was a copy for him – the very first autographed one, if he would be so kind as to sign it.

The whole thing was a nice moment for them and his friend’s family, with whom OP is very close. When his friend read over what OP had written about him in the ‘about the author’ section, he teared up a little. This is one of the only times making someone cry made OP feel good!

But his girlfriend was there during this whole display and didn’t say much. She went home early while he stayed the night with his friend.

“Weaponized Incompetence”

When they talked the next day, she told him the gift thing was overkill, and it was proof that he was using “weaponized incompetence” previously in order to get out of putting time and thought into gifts for her.

OP explained that he would normally do some Google searches about what his girlfriend might like and then go to the mall and make some rounds, but he usually comes up empty.

Most of the suggested gifts don’t feel super personal anyway, and he figures she’d usually just like to pick something out for herself since she’ll obviously like it no matter what that way.

There are only a handful of people he’s able to truly get good gifts for. He has mostly got her gift cards or items she specifically asks for.

He and his best friend have known each other for eight years, and he’s been with his girlfriend for a little over a year. He thinks that getting a gift for his friend is actually kind of a double-edged sword.

While he does come up with ideas easier, a lot of them seem lackluster in terms of what he would like to do for his friend because his friend is doing amazing right now. He’s kicking life’s butt. So there is a lot of second-guessing and rethinking and reworking.

Some People Are Harder Than Others

But this stroke of genius OP had for his friend’s birthday was perfect the second he thought of it. With his girlfriend, it’s hard for him to come up with ideas at all.

Now OP is kind of at a loss. He didn’t think the nice gesture was indicative of anything other than him doing something kind. He’s wondering if his girlfriend was right and if he’s a jerk.

And Reddit users were not shy in their criticism of this guy. He clearly showed that he has a boundless energy to put into thinking of gifts for his friends and none for his girlfriend.

He’s a lazy boyfriend and was making a lot of excuses to cover the fact that he doesn’t pay attention to his girlfriend and doesn’t know what sort of gift she would like.

It’s understandable his girlfriend would be upset with him after receiving thoughtless gifts in the past, especially when she’s got a front-row view of the huge amount of care and thought that he put into his friend’s gift.

Redditors overwhelmingly told him that he was a jerk for not caring enough to go to that effort for his girlfriend. One user said, “It may not be weaponized incompetence– it could just be that you don’t care about your girlfriend’s happiness and/or don’t pay enough attention to her personality and interests. Lots of possibilities here. None are good.”

What do you think about his story? Should he make more of an effort to listen to his girlfriend, or was she upset over nothing?

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The post He Can’t Choose a Gift to Save His Life, or So He Says. But He’s GF Wonders Why His Bestie Got a Top Gift While She Misses Out first appeared on Wealthy Living

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Source: Reddit