In a recent Reddit discussion, people debated whether Arjun’s decision to ask for his girlfriend’s father’s blessing before proposing was appropriate after she completely blew up at him. Let’s take a look.
Arjun’s Love Story
Arjun, a 26-year-old guy deeply in love with his girlfriend, Lila, found himself at a crossroads.
He had been dating Lila, a smart, caring, and beautiful woman, for a little over a year.
The Proposal Plan
Their connection was strong, and Arjun felt the time was right to take their relationship to the next level.
He had been contemplating a proposal for a while now, and with his stable job and savings, he was ready to commit.
The Perfect Setting for a Proposal
As fate would have it, they were visiting her hometown for a week, and Arjun saw this as the perfect opportunity to ask her father for his blessing.
While he had only met her family a few times due to the distance between their cities, they had always seemed welcoming. Lila’s father, in particular, was super easygoing, which eased Arjun’s nerves.
A Heartfelt Conversation
So, one afternoon, while Lila was out reconnecting with old friends, Arjun decided to have a heart-to-heart conversation with her father.
He nervously but earnestly asked if he could have his blessing to marry his beloved daughter.
A Father’s Bewilderment
Her father, caught off guard, seemed bewildered and asked if Arjun was being serious.
Arjun assured him that he was genuinely in love with his daughter and would take care of her and give her a life of comfort and happiness.
Unforeseen Reactions
To Arjun’s surprise, her father’s response was not what he had hoped for. He appeared uncomfortable and unsure and said, “Woah, I don’t know what to say. I was not expecting that.”
An incredibly awkward silence filled the room, and her father left the room in silence, leaving Arjun feeling disappointed but not ready to give up hope just yet. He still believed he could convince Lila’s dad.
Lila Learns About Arjun’s Proposal
However, the situation took an unexpected turn when Lila returned home after receiving a phone call from her mother.
Her mother had told her about Arjun’s conversation with her father, and this had completely shocked Lila.
Lila’s Anger with Arjun’s Approach
Lila was not pleased with Arjun, to say the least! She was mad that he’d approached her father instead of discussing it with her directly.
Tradition vs. Modernity
Lila thought this tradition was sexist and outdated, which Arjun thought was stupid because the point of asking her dad was for permission to propose, not to marry her by force.
Besides that, Lila said she was nowhere near ready for marriage yet – especially considering they were only one year into their relationship!
A Night Apart
She said she felt he’d humiliated her in front of her parents and left to spend the night at her mother’s place.
This left Arjun alone with her father – very awkward as he’d been avoiding Arjun since their conversation.
Feeling Betrayed by Lila’s Parents
This entire situation left Arjun bewildered. He had thought they were on the same page regarding their future.
Lila’s reaction hurt him, and he couldn’t understand why she saw the idea of marrying him as absurd. He was also furious at her parents – why did they need to tell her of his plans instead of letting him propose how he wanted?
A Premature Proposal?
He desperately needed a second opinion, so took to Reddit to find out what they thought. Opinions varied, but many Reddit users believed that Arjun was in the wrong.
One Redditor felt that Arjun’s mistake was not necessarily in asking for the blessing but in failing to have prior discussions with Lila about their future and marriage.
Don’t You Know Her?
He calmly pointed out, “I get you wanted to go all traditional and ask her father’s blessing before asking her, it’s not really my thing but to each their own.
A year of dating is long enough to have had talks of marriage. But you haven’t had talks, you jumped straight to the finish line. You’ve dated a year without figuring out that she was the type of person who saw the blessing thing as sexist.”
The Age Factor
Other users highlighted the couple’s relatively short one-year relationship and their young ages, with one summing it up by posting, “She’s 22 and you’ve only been dating a little over a year. Ofc she’s not ready for marriage (no hate to those who marry young).”
Honest Conversations
The majority of Redditors felt that Arjun’s decision to ask for Lila’s father’s blessing before having a more in-depth conversation with her was premature and misguided.
They emphasized that he needed to talk – really talk – with Lila in order to find out her thoughts before jumping into a proposal.
Jumping the Gun
One user thought “It shows that you and your girlfriend haven’t talked enough about what your theoretical future together looks like to be on the same page, and that’s a problem.
The exact timing can be a surprise, but both people ought to have the idea that getting married in the near future is a shared desire.”
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The post His ‘Controversial’ Proposal Move Sparks Relationship Turmoil – Was He Sexist for Asking for Her Hand in Marriage? first appeared on Wealthy Living.
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / Andrew Angelov. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.