A man took to Reddit asking for advice after his wife told him that she didn’t want to get a job and just wanted to travel the world on his paycheck.
They Worked Together
Our protagonist, the Original Poster (OP), has been with his wife for eight years now, and they both have been working for most of the time together. While OP’s job requires him to travel frequently, it pays well, and he can manage to pay for most of their expenses.
On the other hand, his wife has been working part-time while actively attending college for the past few years and is soon to graduate.
They’re Going to Move to Texas
OP and his wife have been discussing their plans for the future and how they’ll manage it. They plan to move across the country in early 2024, and OP informed his wife that he would be out of state for two months for work (Jan-Feb). He thinks it wouldn’t make sense for her to move with him during those two months, as he would be returning to their potential home in Texas after completing his work.
He suggested that his wife stay with her family while he was away and save money to buy a nice home. However, his wife had other plans in mind. She told him she didn’t want to work and would rather travel the country with her retired dad. She wants to use their extra money to travel the country.
She Wants to Travel First
She said that since OP would be traveling a lot next year for work (about one-month trips at a time), she’d rather have him pay for her to travel with her dad instead of “saving for a house he won’t even be here to live in with her.”
Moreover, she told him that her job doesn’t pay much in Texas compared to where they are currently located ($30ish/hr -> $16/hr) and that she shouldn’t have to work anyway because she “wouldn’t make any money.”
OP felt it was unfair for him to have to pay for everything, and he explained that even though he’s traveling, it’s not for vacation. He’s doing manual labor and will be busy working, not having fun on a job site.
He Doesn’t Want to Pay for Her Travel Plans
OP was frustrated because he felt like he was the bad guy for suggesting his wife get a part-time job, save up for a month, and then use that money strictly for traveling the next month, using the extra money they had saved up for a home. He didn’t know how to go about the situation.
OP needs to communicate with his wife and express his concerns to her. It’s essential to understand each other’s points of view and come up with a solution that works for both of them. OP’s wife may not understand the demands of his job, and it’s crucial to communicate that to her.
They Need to Reach an Agreement Together
They need to discuss their long-term goals and what they want to achieve in the future. If they both agree that traveling is essential to them, they should come up with a plan that works for both of them. It could be something as simple as planning to take a vacation every few months and saving money for it.
On the other hand, if they both want to save up for a home, they should devise a plan to achieve that goal. OP’s wife may have to work part-time or even full-time to contribute towards that goal, and OP may have to reduce his expenses to save more money. It’s important to remember that achieving long-term goals requires sacrifice and compromise.
OP needs to have an open and honest conversation with his wife and come up with a plan that works for both of them.
They Need to Decide on Their Priorities
Reddit users have offered their opinions on the matter. Some say that OP should tell his wife no and not be her sugar daddy.
Others suggest that his wife may not want to move to Texas and take a 50% pay cut, so she is not motivated to work. Additionally, some users pointed out that OP’s wife does not want to never work, but rather not work while OP is gone for months at a time. Taking a 50% pay cut to work part-time in a new state, they may or may not stay in afterward, is not very appealing.
One user suggests that instead of paying rent on an apartment for a year, OP’s wife could take some time to travel after graduation before starting her new career. They argue that at $16/hr, she would be better off financially, and she cannot build anything career-wise yet if OP does not even know if he wants to stay in Texas.
What do you think? What should he do?
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / Dean Drobot. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.