Is It Wrong to Ask Their Party Guests to Contribute to the Cost of Their DnD Parties?

She wants to know if she was wrong for planning to put a tip jar for DnD days, her fiancé was very much against the idea. Here’s the full story.

They Host DND Parties

The Original Poster (OP) is a 22-year-old who is living with her 26-year-old fiancé. They are a happy couple, and every other Saturday, they host DnD in their apartment. They invite their roommate, OP’s fiancé’s sister, and three other friends.

They are all in good standing and have a great time, and everyone involved says that these sessions have kept them all happy and relaxed with all their work and stressful lives.

He Works, She’s a Student

The couple is solely able to support themselves through her fiancé’s income. He works a third-shift blue-collar job, which he enjoys, five days a week with the opportunity of overtime, while OP’s currently enrolled in cosmetology school.

She shared that since her cosmetology school was only going to take a little under a year, they agreed to try it.

However, OP has a very difficult time finding a job because she has to drive an hour to and from school four days a week from 9 am to 5 pm.

Despite this, she occasionally works in retail on Monday and Sunday as her supervisor doesn’t have any other hours to set. OP shared that initially, she worked Saturday through Monday and took every other Saturday off for DnD or school events.

Plus, OP’s fiancé pays for their shared gas, groceries, phone, car, rent, and a few other expenses, but OP pitches in where she can.

The Costs Are Adding Up

Every two weeks, they spend between $50 and $65 on snacks and a variety of drinks for the DnD sessions.

While the group enjoys the DnD sessions, the cost of providing snacks and drinks every two weeks has been adding up, and recently, OP has suggested placing a NO-obligation tip jar on top of their mini fridge for their friends to put spare change in as they like if they want to.

But, because the fiancé doesn’t want to detract from the fun of the sessions by essentially guilt-tripping everyone into paying for their time with them, he has rejected OP’s idea.

Their Finances Are Tight

OP says they’ve been “struggling” lately because her job hours have been reduced, and her fiancé hasn’t been working overtime.

On occasions, her fiancé finds himself taking money out of his savings, which OP knows irks him but he won’t talk about.

OP wants to explore the concept of a tip jar or some other alternative that involves everyone at the table chipping in occasionally, but her fiancé is extremely definite in his no. She’s thinking of just doing it anyway without asking.

So OP took to Reddit to ask whether she is wrong.

The Reddit community supported OP and said that she was not wrong.

They Need to Speak Up

One Redditor said that OP’s tip jar idea is great. The comment further read, “However, I would suggest making the game nights potluck spread instead of a tip jar. It would allow both your partner and your guests to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that their contributions are food based.”

Another Redditor pointed out that she is not wrong, but tip jar is not the answer. The Redditor mentioned talking with her friends, and it’s not fair that OP and her fiancé have to foot the bill every time and set up a rotating schedule of who brings the snacks and drinks and have fun with it, and OP’s fiancé is being silly not to speak up, and they are friends.

A third Reddit user wrote, “Expecting the host for DnD to always supply the snacks is excessive. Personally, I would recommend a tip jar. Instead, talk about it with them and either take a potluck style approach, with everyone bringing something, or a rotation, where everyone takes turns providing snacks. I can also see where your fiance is coming from, and while your friends could have taken the initiative, I won’t hold it against them as nothing has been mentioned to them.”

What do you think? Would you put up a tip jar?

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Source: Reddit