She is a loyal and committed daughter and big sister and has put herself out to support her family. However, she just doesn’t feel a bond and is more emotionally connected to the cat. Should she feel guilty?
Her Parents Didn’t Support Her
The Original Poster (OP) is a 26-year-old whose parents divorced when she was 12.
Five years after the divorce, her relationship with her parents severely deteriorated after she came out.
Mom Moved On
By that time, her mother was already dating another man at the time, and when OP was 17 years old, her mother gave birth to her half-brother.
She Moved To Pursue Her Dreams
After graduating a year later, OP moved away from her hometown to pursue her studies and eventually a job.
A Fresh Start
The fact that OP was able to live in another place without them and visit her family occasionally was her biggest accomplishment up to that point.
OP and her mother were eventually able to mend their relationship, although it was never the same.
She’s a Closed Book
The truth is that OP doesn’t love being in her company, and she doesn’t open up to her about her life.
She Can’t Forgive Her Mom
OP said she could never truly forgive her mother for the extreme desolation and loneliness she felt as a lesbian teen living in a town that was not very accepting of LGBT people.
Baby Bro Picking Up Prejudice
OP says her half-brother is also a subject of her mother’s coldness. He has already picked up some of OP’s mother’s narrow-minded opinions, not specifically about gay people, but generally.
His Father Died
The story began when her mother’s ex-boyfriend/OP’s half-brother’s father passed away two years ago.
She Encouraged Them to Move Closer
Though OP didn’t really want to, OP proposed that they move to the place she lived in so that she could help them with the costs and OP’s stepbrother would have a better future because, after the death, OP’s mother and brother really had no one left in their hometown.
They Moved In!
Eventually, they agreed and moved in with OP.
She Doesn’t Come Home Until They’re Sleeping
OP doesn’t spend time with them very much.
They occasionally eat supper together, but most of the time, OP goes to work and the gym and arrives home after her mother and brother have gone to bed.
Movies Once a Month
OP takes her brother to the movies once a month, but it’s always at her mother’s request.
She always made it clear to them that she likes to be independent and that they should not bother her, and they all agreed.
Her Mom Wanted More
However, her mother was not pleased with OP’s lack of interest in them, even though she had grown somewhat accustomed to it and didn’t put any pressure on OP.
A New Member of the Family
The story took a turn when the family recently adopted a kitten.
She Adapts Her Life Around the Kitten
OP loves her and plays with her all the time. OP said she even adjusted her schedule to accommodate her kitten’s requirements.
Her Mom Is Not Impressed
As a result, OP’s mother has become increasingly irritated with OP, and she confronted her about it.
Kitten Prioritized Over Brother
She stated it’s quite upsetting to watch OP prioritize a cat above her fatherless brother since he needs attention more than ever, and no child should grow up believing that they are less significant than a pet.
She’s More Connected to the Cat
OP says she doesn’t believe her brother is any less significant than anyone else, and she does love him in her own way.
But OP just can’t connect with her mother as a result of her coldness during her childhood.
Should She Feel Guilty?
OP felt bad about what happened, and she took to Reddit to ask whether she was wrong for preferring her cat.
The Cat Loves You Unconditionally
Several Redditors sided with OP and said that she is not wrong and a cat offers emotional support and unconditional love and a cat doesn’t treat you poorly.
They Don’t Deserve You
One Reddit user wrote, “You already give them far more than they deserve (attention and money).
You are not the cause of the problem with this relationship: she is. I would point that out. Be clear, be blunt.”
She Failed Once
Another Redditor commented, “Seems to me it’s Mom’s job to pay attention to Brother and make him feel loved and special. She dropped the ball with you and is fumbling now with your half-brother. Mom needs to step up and contribute for once. This responsibility does not change just because you have found something to do.”
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Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / fizkes. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.
This post is based on Reddit but the names have been changed.