Mommy’s Boy: Son Steps in to Help Manage Mom’s Work Stress, but Ends Up Blaming Her!

Difficulty managing stress levels is a common problem – however, this guy’s woes come from an unlikely source. His mom won’t take control of her own situation and instead leans on his composure for support. He’s tired of being a passive shoulder to cry on, he wants her to change now! 

He Lives With His Mom

Image Credit: Shutterstock / fizkes

The Original Poster (OP) is a 27-year-old who is living with his 62-year-old mother.

He gets along great with his mother, and they rarely have arguments.

Her Stress Levels Have Risen

Image Credit: Shutterstock / pathdoc

His mother has been employed at her current job for almost 15 years, and her stress level has significantly risen over the past five years.

She Wants a New Job

Image Credit: Shutterstock / fizkes

His mother has been looking for a new job for the past three years but has been unsuccessful for a number of reasons OP’s not willing to share.

OP says that her current job doesn’t truly make her happy as she has a terrible supervisor.

It’s Never Good Enough!

Image Credit: Shutterstock / Herlanzer

The supervisor has very high expectations and is quite demanding and is the kind of manager that believes in setting lofty targets and worrying his workers even if he is aware that those targets are unrealistic expectations.

Long-Winded

arguments
Image Credit: Shutterstock / PeopleImages-Yuri A

Plus, the supervisor regularly demands the employees, including OP’s mother, explain back to him what he wants to be done and sometimes indirectly threatens to fire them.

However, OP says that his mother loves to start conversations and discusses thousands of aspects and is not a person who ends with the short “okay.”

Defensive Reactions

Image Credit: Shutterstock / fizkes

OP goes on to mention that his mother feels insecure at times, and she speaks about everything else rather than the genuine problem and gets angry very quickly.

And as a result, OP thinks she is the one who starts arguments with her supervisor regarding various topics.

He Lends an Ear

argue
Image Credit: Shutterstock / pikselstock

Later, OP’s mother discusses her day and complains about them.

Usually, OP listens to her complaints and makes an effort to help her, but since that doesn’t really work, he has made several attempts to convince her that cutting down on her arguments with her boss would help her feel less stressed.

Self Inflicted

Image Credit: Shutterstock / Grustock

OP said he thinks she is “doing a lot of this to herself” and needs to learn better stress management techniques.

Although he didn’t mention this out loud, he did mention to her that she could get some stress management skills to “handle stress better” because finding a new job is not an option and that while this is not the answer to all of her problems, it might at least be able to help her.

She Should Manage Her Stress

Image Credit: Shutterstock /Grustock

However, his mother refused to hear any of it and dismissed the advice saying that OP was wrong and doesn’t understand her problems.

It’s understandable why OP’s mother may have felt upset or offended by the suggestion.

He Was Insensitive

Image Credit: Shutterstock / PKpix

His mother is already stressed out and may feel like OP is trivializing her problems.

OP is worried about his mother’s stress levels, as he feels that it may lead to burnout. The idea of seeing his mother ill has caused OP to think about what he said.

He Could Have Handled It Better

Image Credit: Shutterstock / Q-stock

Redditors commented on their thoughts, saying that both were not wrong.

One Reddit user pointed out that OP’s mom was fused in her emotion and stressed, so she is not fully wrong, and OP intended to help, so he was too not fully wrong. But the choice of words saying “handle stress better” did have a triggering effect on his mom.

You’re Right to Help

Image Credit: Shutterstock / Cookie Studio

The comment read, “What I would like to offer though is you’re right to try to want to help, but this only works if you get a mandate to do so. And from parents to the kids, that’s not an easy mandate to give.”

How to Create a Growth Mindset

Image Credit: Shutterstock / fizkes

“If you try to help without a mandate, it breeds reluctance, resistance, and maybe even a conflictual reaction. Telling people what to do, generally, isn’t a great way to elicit profound change, since you have to account for a mandate, state, phrasing, etc…modeling a helpful behavior or putting people in a growth mindset first tends to be necessary.”

Grandparents Refuse to Use the Names She Has Carefully Chosen for Her Beautiful Twins! Instead…They Call Them AWFUL Nicknames – Wait Until You Hear Them!

Image Credit: Shutterstock /Andrii Iemelianenko

A Reddit user wrote about their recent experience dealing with their parents who refused to use their grandchildren’s names. Grandparents Refuse to Use the Names She Has Carefully Chosen for Her Beautiful Twins! Instead…They Call Them AWFUL Nicknames – Wait Until You Hear Them!

Revenge: Worker Takes Employer to Court for $38 – Wait Until You Hear How Much He Got!

Image Credit: Shutterstock / Netpixi

This Redditor’s story begins in 1998 when the poster had recently moved from Michigan to Virginia. He was working as an irrigation tech for a large regional landscape company at the time. Revenge: Worker Takes Employer to Court for $38 – Wait Until You Hear How Much He Got!

Stepmom Asks Stepson to Move Out to Give Biological Son “More Space” – Husband Reacts in Fury!

Image Credit: Shutterstock / George Rudy

A Reddit user wrote about her experience asking her stepson to move out of their home to give her biological son more living space. Stepmom Asks Stepson to Move Out to Give Biological Son “More Space” – Husband Reacts in Fury!

Son Sets the Record Straight by Telling Dad’s New Wife EXACTLY What Kind of Father She Married: Just Deserts or Pure Revenge?

Image Credit: Shutterstock / AJR_photo

A Reddit user posted to the online community to share his story and ask for their opinions about his difficult relationship with his father. Son Sets the Record Straight by Telling Dad’s New Wife EXACTLY What Kind of Father She Married: Just Deserts or Pure Revenge?

Bride Chooses Gay “Dad” to Walk Her Down the Aisle Instead of Her Stepfather – He Reacts Furiously!

Image Credit: Shutterstock / IVASHstudio

A woman asked Reddit if she had gone too far by telling her stepfather to stay in the shadows at her wedding. Bride Chooses Gay “Dad” to Walk Her Down the Aisle Instead of Her Stepfather – He Reacts Furiously!

The post Mommy’s Boy: Son Steps in to Help Manage Mom’s Work Stress, but Ends up Blaming Her! first appeared on Wealthy Living.

Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / Miss Ty. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.

Source: Reddit