Family dynamics can be difficult at the best times, and knowing when to establish boundaries with loved ones can be difficult. That’s exactly what this woman had to do, though.
Unbalanced Family Dynamics
Agatha, a 27-year-old married woman, is currently a full-time graduate student working part-time. She has no children, but she plans to start a family soon.
Agatha has always been close to her sister, but lately, she has been feeling a bit frustrated by her sister’s behavior. Her sister seems to have this idea that because Agatha doesn’t have children, she doesn’t work as hard or have as much on her plate as her sister does.
This attitude has resulted in Agatha bending over backward to help her sister whenever possible. She has delivered food, babysat, and even had her husband fix her sister’s truck for free. Agatha believes that this is what family does for each other, and she has always been happy to help out. However, her sister’s behavior has started to get on her nerves.
She Invited Her to Her Graduation
The latest incident occurred when Agatha invited her sister to attend her graduation ceremony. She is due to graduate next month, and she wanted her sister to be there to share in the moment.
Her sister has a 4-year-old child and shares parenting with her ex, so she has her child with her for 3-4 days every week. When Agatha invited her sister to her graduation, her sister declined, citing her son as the reason.
She said that her son would be bored and that she didn’t want to deal with that. Agatha tried to persuade her sister by saying that it was only an hour-long ceremony and that other kids would be there, but her sister remained adamant.
Her Refusal Hurt
This hurt Agatha’s feelings and felt like the final straw for her. Her sister habitually used her nephew as an excuse for things she didn’t want to do, and it was starting to get to Agatha.
Two weeks had passed since the incident, and her sister had asked her for a few favors during that time, but Agatha had refused to help. Last week, her sister asked Agatha to pick up a Gatorade from the store and drop it off because her son really wanted one, but Agatha was too busy. Yesterday, her sister asked her to babysit her nephew while she went to get her nails done, but Agatha said no.
She Would “Match Her Energy”
When her sister asked what was happening, Agatha explained that she matched her sister’s energy. If her sister couldn’t make an effort for her, then she wasn’t going to make an effort for her sister.
Her sister responded with a snarky comment about how “the village was really dead,” and she started posting online about how she had no village. People started messaging Agatha, asking her what was going on because her sister had a huge family and a lot of support.
Agatha tried to explain the situation to her mother, but her mother thought that Agatha was being petty. Agatha didn’t see it that way, though. She wasn’t trying to hurt her sister, but she was tired of always bending over backward for her when her sister wouldn’t do the same.
She’d Had Enough
It was frustrating, and Agatha felt like her sister was taking her for granted. She wanted to know if she was being a jerk, so she took to Reddit.
The people on Reddit who responded to Agatha’s post said that she was not a jerk and that her sister was a narcissist who only wanted a free servant. They pointed out that Agatha deserved better than that and that pulling back when a relationship becomes one-sided was perfectly fine.
They all agreed that Agatha’s sister was selfish, entitled, and abusing her support system.
She Doesn’t Want to be Taken for Granted
Agatha is aware that her sister has a huge support system, and she’s not trying to hurt her sister. She only wants to stop being taken for granted and be treated with the same respect and consideration she gives her sister.
She is not being petty but standing up for herself and her boundaries. Agatha hopes that her sister will come to her senses and realize that family relationships are reciprocal and not one-sided.
This serves as a reminder of the importance of reciprocity in any relationship, especially among family members. While it is natural to help our loved ones in times of need, it shouldn’t be expected or taken advantage of without any effort to reciprocate.
Agatha’s decision to match her sister’s energy may seem harsh, but it is a necessary step to establish boundaries and respect in their relationship.
The story’s moral is that it is okay to say no when we are not in a position to help, and it is important to communicate our needs and expectations clearly. In the end, a healthy relationship is built on mutual respect, trust, and empathy, and it takes effort and commitment from both parties to maintain it.
What do you think Agatha should do?
The post She Decided It Was Time to Give Her Sister a Taste of Her Own Medicine, She Didn’t Like It! first appeared on Wealthy Living
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / Denis OREA. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.