For this Reddit user, her decision to offer her grieving brother a place to stay after a tragic loss quickly becomes a test of patience and conflicting ideologies. Their clash in values and beliefs quickly created a challenging situation.
A Fundamentalist Christian Upbringing
The Original Poster (OP) aged 29, and her siblings aged 22 and 15 were raised by strict, fundamentalist Christians.
OP left her home when she became 17 and joined the military.
While she distanced herself from the fundamentalist Christianity practiced by her family, her brother remained a devoted believer.
About a month ago OP’s brother’s wife and two children passed away in a vehicle accident.
Her Brother Suffered a Tragedy, So She Took Him In
Although OP and her brother don’t get along very well, he is still family. So OP offered to let her brother remain with her since he didn’t want to go home and have to see his family’s belongings.
After a week or two, OP was back to her regular schedule.
OP says she doesn’t know what to do other than return to her routine because her brother spends most of his time in his room being depressed.
She offered her full support and even told him to consult a therapist or psychologist. But, he refused saying that “the Lord provides” and will help him with his problem.
So OP left him to his beliefs and carried on.
She Carried on With Her Life
OP started going on dates and ended up clicking with one man.
One day, when they went to his apartment, his roommates started having a huge argument, so he asked if they could leave for OP’s place. They spent the entire night on the couch and watched GBBO.
Things turned ugly when her brother decided to give her a speech on “appropriate interactions” with males she’s not married to.
He Warned Her About “Appropriate Interactions” With Males
OP got angry and warned him by telling him that the only reason she was allowing him to stay is in light of what happened. As a result, her brother went silent and returned to his room.
However, in the days that followed, her brother gave her advice on having successful relations, and OP reminded him once more that his wife is the only reason she hasn’t kicked him out into the streets.
The story took an unexpected turn when OP’s sister reached out with a distressing revelation.
When OP went to see her, she was sobbing openly, her bag was packed, and OP could hear her parents arguing inside.
Her Sister Came Out
OP’s sister confessed to being gay and fearing the repercussions of their parents discovering her secret relationship.
She told OP she can’t stay with her parents or with OP because their brother is there and would probably find out about it from their parents.
But OP assured her that she can remain in her room and they’ll figure it out in the morning, adding that she’ll sneak her in without their brother noticing.
OP didn’t want to leave her somewhere or with someone she doesn’t know.
She Let Her Stay, Even Though Her Brother Was There
However, when the morning came, they all sat down at the kitchen table, and then her brother began giving his “You must resist the temptation of sin” speech.
OP sent her sister to her room and ordered her brother to stop right away.
He started arguing with OP about how “we have to save her from these feelings” and OP snapped at him telling that he has 30 seconds to start packing and stop talking or she’ll call the police.
Now OP felt bad about what happened and she took to Reddit to ask whether she was wrong.
She Had to Kick Him Out
Redditors supported OP and said she was not wrong and that her brother can stay with his parents as they sound like they would get on just fine.
One Redditor commented, “How did you turn out so normal? Brother needs to get the log out of his own eye – he’s got no place lecturing you. You protected your sister, who now says you were mean -for protecting her. You have repeatedly followed the Great Commandment while those you have helped are first to cast a stone at you.”
Another Reddit user wrote, “Your brother overstayed his hand when he lectured you about your own relationships let alone lecture your sister about living her own life.”
So what do you think? Was OP wrong or was her brother wrong?
Featured Image Credit: Shutterstock / ViDI Studio. The people shown in the images are for illustrative purposes only, not the actual people featured in the story.